4/7/2023 -
First the prototypical bored on vacation with my family dream. I swear I'm never going to come on one of these tedious ass vacations ever again. God, we were supposed to be going home tomorrow but it doesn't look like anyone's ready to go home. What the fuck? When will this ever end? Typical shit. Then there's the feeling, that nauseating feeling of insufferable boredom. It's different this time though because I wake up and understand why it's happening. I'm some sort of jacked up daemon god made out of psychic hyper-color madness. I'm particularly susceptible to boredom. They're torturing me. Testing me. They don't know how these dayglo psi portals through the human experience work quite yet. The next model will be superior because of what I'm doing. Slicker.
Now I'm back under and in Invisible College Columbus. This dream goes on for what seems like an eternity but here are some highlights:
I visit the old 7-11 that I used to work at and realize a guy who worked there over 20 years ago still works there. He doesn't recognize me.
After this I have an in dream synchronicity. I'm supposed to be meeting up with my family eventually and I for some reason find myself wasting time inside of this large grey bricked building. Eventually I realize that it's a church and excuse myself to the parking lot as the service is starting, where I then run into my Dad. We are both stunned by this sync. Like, we were both going to meet up in the city tomorrow or whatever and somehow we found ourselves in the exact same parking lot at the exact same time? Bonkers.
This is basically a work/school trip and I'm supposed to be working on some project. I meet up with the dude at the place that I'm staying which is like this skeez rock Air B & B or something. The guy running it is this tall thin super grizzled looking rocker dude with Rolling Stones style shoulder length hair, open shirt, etc. I don't have a ton of confidence in this guy.
I'm supposed to help the dude upstairs who runs a convenience store. When I'm recruited to do this I realize, how convenient (pun intended) because I actually have experience doing exactly this. I mean, more than 20 years ago at this point but still. I think he wants me to stock beer in his beverage coolers but it's not clear. Eventually all these college kids start coming in and scooping up booze in droves. The place is packed. Oh yeah, selling beer to college kids on a Friday night is some pretty easy money bullshit I think to myself. I also think I'm supposed to help stock the beer but I can't figure out how to get back into the fridge. No one gave me the key. The kids keep talking about the goddamn Winnie the Pooh horror movie (I did just read an article about it the day before). Some of them just saw it, some of them are going to see it right after stocking up on beer. I'm shocked by this because it looks incredibly stupid but then:
I start watching the film and pretty quickly begin flying out of my body. I am now completely disembodied consciousness floating through the spectral city. It's no different than an extended drone shot except that I can feel the wind on my skin and the sensation of effortlessly floating through thin air. I'm not in control though. Something else is guiding the action and it's guiding it to this absolutely stunning park in the edge of the city. If I had to guess what this is, I'd guess some sort of wartime monument. There's a patch of golf green short cut grass leading up to this I'd say 30 foot metallic monument protruding mildly into the sky in front of this gorgeous green valley view. Super fucking cool and of course both the view and the psychic cinematography are excellent. After the shot is done I continue to look out from the viewpoint. There's nothing this pretty in Columbus I tell myself. Then I gaze at the rolling green hills and think to myself? Is there?
I'm back assisting with the project again but there's more time to kill. Now I'm in this insanely beautiful mansion overlooking the ocean. There's like this entire picture hallway of gigantic windows overlooking the surf at least 3 floors up. I'm sort of shocked by how stunning it is but also in a dream state aware of the ridiculous inequities involved with its creation. I feel slightly guilty about being here. It is fucking amazing though and once again, the waves are crashing increasingly violently into the shore (this happens all the time in my dream life and I'm reminding myself to contemplate it extensively). I'm for some reason assured that it's not a problem as I watch the water cascade up onto the elevated glass. It is sublime.
Now I'm back at the job. The show is in the basement of the scuzz rock Vrbo and I'm helping organize it I suppose, although I can't tell what exactly I'm doing to help other than that I apparently know the bassist. It's this very small basement club, not much different than the club Bernie's in wayback Columbus honestly, which is I'm sure the inspiration. It's slightly different though as there's more of a wood paneled old world pub sort of vibe. The band that's playing is this goth metal project with super fast virtuosic synth key flourishes. Very very weird vibes. It's a small venue and it seems fairly packed but I'd guess that there are like 150 people there. Holy crap are they dedicated though. I mean, this band doesn't have a ton of fans, but the fans they have are freaking fanatical. These people are so excited to see this band it's insane and I get the impression that possibly they haven't played live in a very long time or in general that seeing them live is an incredibly rare thing. Also, and I cannot stress this enough, none of this jibes with me at all. I decidedly do not like this music or the vibes of the fanbase but I'm happy for all of them as they seem ecstatic about getting to enjoy this experience.
I've maybe had one drink and I want to grab at least one more before the end of the set. I go up to order a beer and the bartender looks exactly like the actress who plays the wife in that new Lucky Hank show. I look at the taps but can't read any of the labels other than Pabst and so I order a Pabst. She makes fun of me for ordering such a shitty beer and I'm like, do you have any IPA's? They don't. She recommends this pale ale whatever and I'm like sure. But she won't sell it to me because I can't find my ID. I dig through my wallet forever and nothing is making sense. I have the ID of this other person that's clearly not me from the photo, and a passport style document with no photo. She refuses to serve me and I'm like, seriously? Do I look under 2 fucking 1? I have money. She agrees but no. Rules are rules.
The event has winded down, everyone who worked on the project is now huddled up on one side of the bar and this creepy Texas billionaire dude is yelling at us. The event was a success and we made one of his long time clients happy, but we're fuck ups and we need to stop fucking up. I pretty much immediately hate this guy. Making some rich douche-o-tron even more money? That's what this was about?
Yeah, quite the astral excursion but I will say that wow, lucid dreaming ain't easy. I should have gone lucid at roughly 4 points during that escapade. Both times I was staring out at the scenery I knew it wasn't Columbus but still couldn't put 2 and 2 together. Particularly when the ocean waves were crashing into the giant windows. I even thought to myself:
"There's no ocean near Columbus!"
Then I convinced myself that it must be the Great Lakes, which also makes no sense because Columbus isn't near those either. Then with the bartender looking like the actress from Lucky Hank. I even paused to consider how peculiar this was but still couldn't break through. Shit ain't easy kids. I still screw it up half the time, to this day. After 27 freaking years.
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