6/2/2023 -
You have a dream where you're about to watch an improv sketch about the fecklessness of religion, then the theme bleeds into your dream life for the next two nights. In this particular vision I'm looking into a high rise shared office space's fancy lunchroom from the inside. It's on a higher floor in what feels like Manhattan and the sun is shining through the large skyscraper windows drenching the sprawling cityscape in the background and the room with it. But it's not just the sun that's shining in, there are these white light presences from above hovering on another level of reality completely outside of the scene, the writer's room.
They're discussing the fates of some of the characters who work here and they laugh.
"Is that guy ever going to make a pass at that other dude he has a crush on?"
They're talking about these two relatively attractive obviously high achieving clean cut business bros wearing suits. One clearly has a crush on the other and I also get the vibes that this fantasy would never ever work out because the other suit's not interested at all. I'm not sure he's even gay in the first place.
Now the one who's probably never going to make a pass heads back to his desk. He's making these cut out paper rabbits that he's putting around this endless string of individually framed pictures of children on his desk. It's hard to explain but Holy Christ is this eerie. In fact, it freezes into my mind. I am fully awake while this is happening and the image is stuck behind my eyes as if forcing me to pay attention. It's not like the metaphor is subtle and that's why it's so jarring. We're fucking rabbits to these higher dimensional angelick light beings. The writer's room is laughing at us as we're breeding out of control. Imposition of order = escalation of chaos. The religious repression of sexuality leads to mindless replication. It's materialism masquerading as spirituality.
Later in the night I'm told that we were set up to fail and I was also set up to fail or something like that. As Within, So Without. The point is transformation. Just like I have evolved into something different after my endless string of varying failures, that's the joke/lesson humanity's in for. I'm not gonna lie, the future doesn't look great. They're showing me how big a problem this digital fascism shit is going to get, right after several nights with a Twitter theme. It's sort of:
"What are you going to do about it, water monkey?"
Water monkey is a new one but they're right, they say the mystic swims in the same waters that the madman drowns and I am the goddamn water itself. What am I going to do about it?
In another dream I'm at like a dinner party with a very old and bald Bob Odenkirk. We're drinking and chatting in the kitchen when he asks me where I got my sense of humor from. I answer:
"You and David Cross basically."
He is very disappointed with this answer. When I wake up I understand why completely. I just made plans to hang out with my Dad next week and it was pointed out to me that I got my sense of humor from him during a mushroom trip just last year, which totally tracks. All of the rest of my creativity comes from the crazy in my mom's side but not the weird humor. I had never considered this until the psilocybin gods mentioned it less than a year ago. They're reminding me.
What else? Same dream I always have about needing to check out of a hotel and having to move everything out very quickly. The one thing of note here is that I was leaving to go house/dog sitting the next day for an entire week so I did then essentially spend over an hour loading things in and out of two different houses. This might be the first time I've had this dream and then literally did the thing I was dreaming about a few hours later which was mildly trippy.
5/3/2023 -
Dreams all night about hanging at a party with my mom's side of the family. Same disgust at the fecklessness of religion and what's funny is that this spectral family reunion party goes on all night and I only remember the parts where I'm getting annoyed with some creepy aspect of the talking monkey shit show and pull into a waking state seemingly responding to the disgust. At first it's Fox news style propaganda and how it's been amplified by social media. I say something to the effect of:
"We could write it off as a joke at first but this shit is not funny anymore at all."
Angrily. There are many people there and I'm worried I said it too loud. Jesus, my mom is basically a goddamn Nazi at this point. It's so sad.
Next I'm going on a rant about the creepy disparity between public schools in higher vs. lower income neighborhoods. I'm basically explaining to this guy who grew up in shit circumstances that the suburban schools I went to were fairly excellent. My parents literally moved to the towns with the best schools quite purposefully. It's all so fucking corrupt.
Now I wander into my this weird sexual repression room where this older dude with a blonde beard and long hair is getting it on with this much younger topless small breasted blonde woman. I accidentally wander into this sitch and am like:
"Sorry about that"
It's hidden in a corner of this Unitarian church, now I'm in the main hall and they're really trying to sell us on it but my brother in particular isn't buying it, at all.
"But like, it's maybe a bit better than Evangelical bullshit but it's still pretty fucked up."
They counter:
"Our motto is that we accept anyone of any creed, race, or sexual orientation. We will feed them all. Oh, we will feed them."
Then this other woman chimes in:
"That's part of the problem though because I struggle with my weight and have spent my whole life having body image issues because of my indoctrination into this shit."
I must confess that I don't contemplate the fact that my mom's immediate family were Unitarians much at all but that absolutely was a thing, although I'm not sure any of them take it even remotely seriously at this point. I just never vibed with any of that, even as a kid, and honestly, they still did essentially bully my Mom and Dad into getting married in high school because my Mom got pregnant. So, fair point. How much better was it?
Comentarios