5/7/2023 -
If there's been a consistent theme to my dreams and visions as of late, it's been of dredging up the most buried memories from my psyche imaginable. This scenario is no different as here I find myself in this bar I used to hang out in over a decade ago. Some friends of mine would hold psychedelic DJ nights on Wednesdays there and I'd often swing over after practice and often close the whole thing down. Super fun honestly but also, nope, I had not contemplated this particular aspect of my psych music scene social life in quite some time. In fact, I'd sort of forgotten that sometimes I'd get a few drinks in me and do some minor dream interpretation at these events.
Here these Latino women who I can tell are old friends are seeking my advice as apparently I've helped them before. What's hilarious though is that when they first sit down and approach me they basically tell me I look old. Well, it has been awhile I must confess but they change their assessment to tired and I do confess that I am very tired. This is in fact a lucidity test and I fail unfortunately.
When I start explaining why I'm so worn out, there's a part of me that knows this has to do with me actually trying to sleep on a couch in hotel, where another version of me currently exists. I tap into that part of me briefly, but not long enough for it to stick. This experience actually ends up being precognitive as my wife wakes me up at 5:45am the next 2 mornings and I am currently more mentally tired than I have been in ages while writing this up.
In the dream I'm not too tired to offer advice though and what do they want advice on? Well, one of them is dating this guy that she's sort of sketchy about and her friend goes out of her way to interject that she gets down with this dude regularly in his literal van down by the river. She makes sure I understand this. She's not doing a bit. Her friend is literally getting it on in a van down by the river on the regs. I'm not convinced this is a bad thing on its face. I was sort of hoping they wanted psychic advice though and this is basic relationship bullshit. In fact, I'm not really paying attention but I go through it in my head and point out something very obvious.
"You told me you didn't see a future with this guy, so the answer is that you need to call it off."
I'm legit just repeating her words back to her and that's my advice. I have definitely been in this exact situation before in the waking world.
The next thing I know I have this extended astral tour through The House of Independent Cinema. This is straight up how it's described to me as I did not come up with that term. I wish I could remember more here but all I can really say is that it was dying. The people living there had to move out and it was largely seen as a culturally tragic event. Also, as I was navigating its halls I got the distinct vibe that this involved public access television as well.
Damn, Seattle did have some cool shit back in the day, Bomb Shelter Videos in particular. As I'm going through the public access section of the house holy shit does it get cool. This one resident has these shape shifting curtain walls comprised of black and pink art energy. I can tell that this structure he owns is integral to the art he makes. Again, the way he's manipulating this environment is simply astounding.
There's definitely a sadness too as I see some writers I know who've gotten fucked by the tech boom. Ugh, those good old days are never coming back. Very odd message too as it's like I was sort of a part of the old world but not as entrenched in it to mourn it's loss to the extent that a lot of others will. I will always remember at the very least.
5/8/2023 -
The lead up to this is that I'd been wandering around downtown Vancouver for a couple of days genuinely contemplating the theme of the odd conjured memories from my dream states and I started to get it. Meditating on these forgotten remnants of my past lead me into to some genuinely timeless states. There's a reason wizards are mostly older. The more your memory base grows and you dip in and out of it, the more you feel timeless. It wasn't consistent but there were brief moments where I genuinely felt inhuman and unbound by conventional monkey perception while wide awake because of these inner inquiries.
At night the "It's not that you don't remember, it's that you can't understand" thing happens again. I wake up several times in the night. I can tell something incredibly vivid was going before I pull into normal consciousness but I can't put it together. The only thing I can muster is that multiple potential futures are being analyzed and one of them doesn't compute right. It all feels like a giant swirling orb with a narrative that's incomprehensible to me other than that general theme.
This goes on all night until right before I finally wake up, when I finally have a coherent vision. I'm basically a super hero and I'm making plans with these other two heroes. At the end of our meeting we sort of do the "ready, break!" sports time out thing and with that they both fly into the skies on either side of this modern skyscraper. Except that when they hit near the top they both also vanish into a haze of black smoke. I look down at my mystical dream watch and I can see where they went, which is into totally different modes of time space perception. Different ones too. The one who flew up to the left went off into one variation of time perception to complete his task, and the one on the right to a completely different means of experiencing time.
On my watch these look like arty black mist icons hovering in the top corners of the circular clock face. One is right before the start of the new hour, the other is right after. I'm sure that's entirely metaphorical. The thing that is 100% clear while staring at these icons that seem embedded in a dimension between the watch's very existence rather than a part of the watch itself is that not only do I not understand where they went. I cannot understand.
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